car troubles

this darling lady on the right cleaned the house today, and i greatly appreciate it!

i think gas stations are so cool. there is so much to look at, so many strange things to buy. although it's a rare occurance, i enjoy meals from the gas station. when i got off work tonight, i starting laughing so hard when i saw my car. some birds had a pooping party and it all landed on my car. i went to QT and scrubbed it all off with those window wipers, got gas, a hot dog and a chai latte.

when i pulled into the gas station, there was a police car and an ambulance in the parking lot. i asked the clerk what the deal was, and he told me that a guy's car got stolen, and while running after it...he got run over. nothing more than a few cuts and bruises, but dang. getting hit by your own stolen car. has that EVER happened before?

i get to see heath on tuesday! ednesday we are taking a road trip up to south carolina. i'm scheduled to work, but i have a feeling that i will be really sick on wednesday. i've never called out of work as a lie, so i'm real nervous. nicole told me i call a voicemail and just say my shift and that i can't come in. how easy!

church time, excellent.

"sex isn't the answer...only sometimes"

i felt so good this morning because i woke up at 8 am. around 11, i decided it was MY day to shower. capitalizing "my" makes it seem as if my roommates are given a shower schedule, but that is not the case. i hadn't showered in 5 days and my fingernails were getting really dirty from scratching my dirty head so much, that's the real concern at hand. to cancel out waking up way early, i took a naked nap on the couch. that's a first, and it felt so good.



these little mexican suckers are the worst things in the world. benji bought a pack of them for the party* last night. in the middle is a delicious mango sucker, but before you get there, you must torture yourself through 10 minutes of chili pepper. a girl in my drawing class brought them in on the last day of class last year, and I just soaked off all my chili pepper and indulged myself in mango without any regret.

*end of the Year of the Condor** party, ringing in the Year of Silk Sheets: Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken. I predict this year will catch me up on all my missed sleep. we celebrated the new year in a creepy graveyard eating cupcakes.

**if you are an avid Room Raiders watcher, you may have seen the Year of the Condor banner hanging up in the living room of my friend David's Athens apartment. he was the one with the Beavis and Butthead squash art.

yet another reason japanese people should purchase Earth and force us into their ways:

airbrushed see-through skirts. little japanese boners are popping up everywhere.

mr. chaffin & the bush

I really love my dad so much. He's someone to really look up to. At prospect, the church I grew up in, he plays a big part in the youth group. He's the cool chaperone on all the choir tours. I'm so proud that my dad is the cool one. He always shows his 3 daughters all the love and affection he can give, which is especially appreciated by me, since my mom and I don't have any affection with one another. I am just happy to sit next to her. heaven's prospectors (the youth choir I sang and toured with for 7 years) sang at prospect this morning. I was so happy because these kids are doing the right thing. Their hearts are for the lord and they are going around the country singing about it. it sounds super cheesy, but it's very powerful. This one girl in the choir sang "I can only imagine" and I've never heard a girl that age sing with such "buh-bam." I was just waiting for her to grab the mike pole and go nuts with it. haha. She was real good.

yesterday was casey mcbride's birthday and he had a huge celebration at the cracker barrel. our waitress was ON TOP OF THINGS, for once. after my last sip of sweet tea, i'd look up and she'd have a pitcher ready for me. the lord knows how much I love sweet tea. scottie sat next to me and we made up a song. "b.o. you mother beeeeeepp" I was trying to sing extraordinarily well because I want him to sign me as his special solo artist on his new record label. i'd fit right in. I just know it. after supper we went over to the boys loft and daniel d. brought out his new projector and screen and we watched zoolander on the porch. it was a strange mix of people hanging out, which is good, because the more the merrier, but I was very concerned with lindsey.

I came to lawrenceville around 3 am and snuck elise out of her house. why couldn't she have lived in l'ville in high school? we lay down in the street and listen to my ipod. it was a beautiful moment.

from the back to the future

i woke up this morning on the flip side of jesse's bed. head to foot. in the sex realm, some may refer to it as a 69. because my back was to his back, it is more like a reverse 69. he and i sat outside talking until the sun was up. unlike most of my late nights, this one was worth saying, "yeah, i'm pretty tired today because i stayed up until 6 am." we talked a lot about moving forward in our christian walks. so many people stand in one place and do nothing to grow closer to the Lord. frankly, i'm frustrated with being that way, and it makes me sad that nearly every christian i know is the same way. we have so much more to live for, but we take grace for granted and do nothing to step forward. through talking with people, i know i'm not alone in my frustrations; many of my friends are sick of standing still and want to get out there.

on a whim, i decided to go 85 North to lawrenceville. i made my usual pit stop to the 21, and spent $70. how can i get the number to the worlds record book, because, darlin', that is a new record. i've been having trouble finding cute tops to fit me, thanks to these ginormous tumors leaching onto my chest. i'm almost certain that larges are getting smaller. large is for big girls, and i am not a big girl. we need small, small and a half, medium, medium and a half, large, large and a half. large breasted women of atlanta need H+M with their 0,2,4,6,8,10,12 tops.

i spent the later part of my afternoon cleaning my closet out. when i moved out of my house, my mom re-did my room with fanciful vintage furniture. all my crap is thrown into my closet, along with a good amount of old art work. i loved looking through everything, and i had no problem tossing things in the trashbag. i came across my note box from 6th grade. i shouldn't have read them, but i let myself.

6th grade was the worst year of my life. i know that it was 10 years ago, but it still chokes me up when i think back on that year. i had two friends. julie and mandi. i was really good friends with both of them and they tag teamed up on me. i wanted to fit in so bad that i would do anything to stay part of the "peace, love and happiness" group. i was that girl who would say "do you like this? i don't." and after hearing their response, i'd say, "well, i don't really like it." julie would go out with all the boys that i had mondo crushes on. she'd write me notes and say "get over it, he likes me. i'll try not to rub it in your face too much." i would pass them notes every day asking if they were mad at me (because they were obviously talking crap about me,) and they'd collaborate on a mean note telling me that i was a brat, annoying, stupid, etc. i'd take it from them, but go to my mom's classroom and escape life. all those things are somewhat normal 6th grade things, but can anyone explain why they lied to the counselor and told her that i was suicidal? NO one wanted to be my friend after that happened.

the notes were so hard to read. i was embarrassed for letting myself be THAT girl. for putting up with it. thankfully, i like myself now...and last i heard, julie was real fat.

u;n feeling it

hellllllooooo world.
tonight a bunch of friends from lawrenceville came down and we went to apre diem...however it is spelled. i know i don't drink that much but i can claim "my favorite drink" now, and that would be red bull and vodka.

i've been kinda down lately, but i can feel myself getting better. i get really sad because my younger sister is able to have boyfriends for years at a time, and a lot of my close friends are engaged or close to it...and here i am, single for two years. sometimes, i let myself feel that something is wrong with me...but that is just dumb of me to think. nothing is wrong with me at all. God is just saving me from heartbreak due to little wastes of time.

leah and chris day moved to atlanta. it really makes me so happy. leah is the kind of friend i crave. i can completely let myself shine around her. i have a lot of friends, but only a handfull or two i can truly love and be myself around. those are the ones i hold dearest to my heart and feel safe around. the rest are just people are just surfaces that i haven't uncovered and probably never will. today leah, chris, mick and i drove all over the flashing stoplights of atlanta. seriously, all the lights from east atlanta to howell mill rd we flashing yellow and red. what happened? we spent a great deal of time looking for the perfect windsuits for my party on saturday. i found one that is exactly what i want. sadly, it's only a jacket, but the jacket will suffice for any pants i pick up tomorrow. american pride, baby.

i have no idea what i'm really saying right now. i'll read her in the morning.
i stay up too late every night and it kills me. i feel it's wrath all day long.